Digital Places of Interest

Monday, July 9, 2012

Post #5 Return to Bread Loaf Mountain

Hey folks,

The Dance Known as the
"White Man Overbite"
It's Monday morning, July 9th, and I'm back on the Mountain after a weekend in the City, where I witnessed what can only be described as "a wedding between two people" in a "church," in "Queens."  After the "ceremony," we supposedly attended a "reception," where I allegedly "danced," perhaps going so far as to do the "Watusi," and the "Mashed Potato." Maybe even the "Twist." People also accused me of using too many "air quotes."

But I've come back to Bread Loaf to discover a campus in full swing, humming to the rhythms of summer: the fields are full of students are reading, the Barn is buzzing with teaching, and the porches are full of big-time imbibing. And the Front Desk Mavens are Mavening. So, for today's post, I thought I'd offer some pictorial representation of Bread Loaf in full bloom.

There is nothing I like more in nature than bumpers. 
This young man is engaged in "literature."

"86% of 'literature' is sex, death, and Jesus."-- Albert Einstein
"It's all about me."-- Jesus.

People often say to me, "Man, Bread Loafers really have a great life up there." And they do. What's the secret? Once a week, usually on Mondays after dinner, Bread Loafers sacrifice a virgin, usually an Engineering student from M.I.T. Nerd on Nerd sacrifice.
The secret to surviving at Bread Loaf: chopping off your arm.
The glow of the Litte Theatre at dusk, with rehearsals for Hamlet in full swing. 

The poor quality of this shot--which is of the director of Hamlet--can be explained  by several factors. a) the players forbid the photographing of rehearsal and b) there were 47 mosquitoes my scalp for an all-you-can-eat-buffet. $6.99  

Another fine example Front Desk Mavening: we photograph the skin rashes of frightened little girls and send the photos to their frightened mothers.
Wow. That is a totally accurate description but it sounds really creepy when you read it out loud. In an empty library.

MacNair, realizing she found the elusive blue corner piece.

The West Lawn reception, where students and faculty mingle, and world famous scholars do their best impression of Cornholio.
English Nerd running furiously from the English Nerds.  

English Nerd Letting off Steam. By playing a Word game. 

During my last summer as a student, 2006, a fellow Loafer coined the term, "Summer of Yes." This was a cool way of describing an attitude of personal discovery. By 2012, I've discovered pretty much all I need to discover about me. For instance, I've discovered that I'm about 30 pounds over weight, my Triglycerides are high, and I'm not really as rich as I thought a public school teacher would be. Therefore,  my plan was to make this summer,The Summer of No. As in saying "NO" to: eating too much, eating off campus, and drinking too much. That lasted nearly 8.5 days. This is me, eating too much, in Rosie's diner, the morning after drinking too much. Let's hear three cheers for Will Power!

Will Power: Born March 1st, 1981. Driving for Penske since 2008; Letting me down every weekend since 1996.

Everything you need to know about Edward Brown's Mavenhood is right here before your eyes. Backgammon with Junior Maven Gene and Orioles baseball streaming live.  

This is me, on my first day of driving the Bread Loaf delivery van into town, trying to look as cool as I can. This is also me right before I realize I've lost the set of keys that start the delivery van. This is also me right before Edward says to me in (mock?) disgust, "If you had one more brain cell you'd have one.

That's all for now for folks!

Christian Patrick Clarke
Front Desk Novitiate, 2012
Hic et Ubique 


Brian said...

Will Power is such a dick for letting you down like that. Do you know Habit Power? Much more solid.

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